Manual Seeking Grace

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The technicians wanted her to drink so they could x-ray the solution as it passed her esophagus into her stomach. This would allow us to see if there was physical problems with eating. Well, that was the ideal.


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This is how it went: Grace freaked out at the sight of all those technicians and doctors. She refused to lay still. She refused to drink.

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She arched her back and screamed the moment they placed her in the papoose board. She continued to refuse to drink. My other child, Lia, hearing Grace scream began to scream. I tried to calm Grace, as four of us technicians, the doctor and me struggled to hold her down long enough to get an x-ray. Sweating, anxious, and stressed, I was close to tears as well.

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Yes, I was grateful she placed Grace with me. However, I was angry. Angry at her for drinking. Angry at her for the stress, anxiety and worry she was causing me.

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Perhaps I would have a neuro-typical daughter, sitting in a typical classroom, reading on grade level. It is kept quiet, not talked about because it is difficult to untangle the conflicting emotions. I am grateful because without them, I would not be a mother.


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  • However, I also feel anger towards their addiction and how it has affected two of my children. Resolving these emotions became easier when I realized how strong the addictions had to be for both mothers to not be able to stop during pregnancy. I met both of these women. They loved their children. They made careful choices of where they would place them. I know that if they could have quit during pregnancy, they would have.

    How Do We Seek God's Grace? > 3 Bible Tips > Free Bible Study Guides

    If you or someone you know is feeling like they are done, have lost all hope, please call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at September is National Suicide Prevention Month, but every life is precious no matter the month. There is always hope…. My drive is to reach and impact others to change what they find undesirable in themselves and their lives.

    Eliminate limiting beliefs, move forward and live your life fully. All it takes is one brave step Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter. Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy. Spreading kindness and compassion to a world in desperate need of it Could this young mans life have been spared?

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    Yes, I believe it could have. The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres. Learn more or join us as a community member!

    Taste and See - James Moore Jr. - covered by Seeking Grace

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